...that before Snarkles I was indifferent to pregnant ladies, babies, and cute Mom's. I wasn't all "ooo and awe" over them.
Now, every time I see a pregnant lady I think about how excited having that baby in her life is going to be. I think about all the joy Snarkles has brought us.
When I see a mother with her child, in photographs or person, I just get this incredible sensation. I see something that I didn't see before because now I know what that love between them looks like and I not only see it, I feel it.
I also have this huge sense of guilt for loving this child so hard. Knowing there's another woman out there who should, in all rights, love this child as hard as any mother. She doesn't have the opportunity.
Even though her own choices led to this situation, it has to be hard when she sees those pregnant ladies, babies, and cute Mom's. Does she miss Snarkles every time she sees another baby girl about the same age? Does it bother her to know another woman is loving her child, holding her, and developing a deep bond with her?!
Managing this feel has got to be the hardest part of fostering. Has to be.
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