To foster is NOT to adopt

To announce you are "ADOPTING" is all glory and honor. To announce that you are open to the chance to adopt a child after fostering them for an unknown amount of time...well, no one wants to read that, right?

Yes, fostering can lead to adoption- but I believe that you have to be committed to fostering before you can announce that you are adopting. In fact, I don't feel like you can announce that you are "ADOPTING" before you even have a child {in-foster-care} placed with you, much less one whose case has actually moved to adoption (all children come into foster care with the goal of reunification- the courts make the decision to terminate parental rights at whatever point they see fit).

To be committed to fostering means you have to know that you have no control of any situation, that you will love and provide for, unconditionally, any child placed in your care. You have to believe that there is good in everyone. That you can help the child's parents to become better and that you WILL have a positive impact, no matter what the outcome. You have to go into it knowing you will never regret it, even when it gets the hardest.


In the foster-to-adopt route to adoption, adopting only becomes an option after countless hours have been spent fostering.

So sure, you may foster with the hopes to adopt...but fostering is first and foremost an act of committing yourself to the system- with no promises of the happy ending.

For me it's an act of love and an act of responsibility.

I've been blessed with a house that's too big for two people, a job with a stable income, and parents who raised me to be respectable and capable. So, I was called to act- I was called to do this for reasons greater than my own understanding. It's hard as hell and easier than I ever imagined all at the same time.

What I do understand is that I am doing it because there are children out there that need a loving, stable home and good role models.

It's being part of a community, a community larger than the community of me, where I only do what pleases me and gives me gratification. I am held responsible to the society I live in. If I live here and do nothing, I'm worth nothing. God paid a price for me, I'm worth something so I have to show it. That's why I'm a foster parent.